in defense of bad dates
I just got a call from this guy who I went out with last weekend, who showed up to our date like stoned out of his mind and preceeded to stare silently into space for long stretches at a time, between statements about how braille was useless, and how I was really ‘weirding him out.’ Anyway, he called to tell me that he was really sorry for being all high or whatever, and admitted it was ‘his bad.’ And then we were able to laugh about how I had had to resort to speaking only in sign language during the date because he was tripping me out, and clearly sign is the go to language of the trippin. And after having this nice little reminiscence I’m kind of thinking I might give him another chance see because bad dates give both people permission to be real.
I went on another first date last week, which was going really great, until a post dinner drink when B asked, “You do know that I’m seriously dating someone right?” I do? To which I said, “Really? I like serious dating too.” No, but seriously. Although, he has since ended things with the girlfriend, a doctor in archaeology who’s always on digs anyway, and we’re going out again tonight.
This one guy I went out with immediately launched into the story of his recent broken engagement to an Egyptian princess that ended when her parents found out that he was neither muslim nor Egyptian. After they ‘stole her’ back to Egypt he reportedly spent ‘a month in the bottle’ in Bali before making a valiant attempt at getting his life back together by attending a series of self-help seminars entitled, “The Complete Man.” This is all very intriguing I guess until you look up the word intriguing in the dictionary and find out that it isn’t.
My last serious relationship started with the subject of my affection throwing up all over my bathroom. Soon after we fell madly in love, and then madly out of love, and repeated this pattern for six months with random intervals of vomiting in between.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that you can have your bad date and eat it too.